Wednesday, June 30, 2010

2nd Annual League Scramble a Smashing Success!

For the first time in league history, the mid-summer classic - also known as the league scramble - went off without a single hitch. Golfers frolicked in the sun at a brisk pace, scores went to historically low levels, much laughter and good-natured back slapping could be witnessed on the course, good food was digested, and the evening was topped off with gumdrops, lollipops, and a dazzling fireworks display!

Golfers were unanimously delighted with the results, as the top performers modestly thanked their lucky stars, and those who couldn't claim the top spot this year responded with bold and witty prognostications about next year's results. Also, there was cotton candy.

Upon conclusion of a bountiful buffet provided by the local golf club, the most accomplished of the golfers were singled out for their stellar performances. Rousing ovations and “huzzahs” were observed for the following individual feats:
  • On Glenway's third hole, team captain MIKE KRAUS astounded as he holed a shot that traveled a longer distance than any other holed shot.
  • On the long and difficult fourth hole, young MIKE WARREN struck a tee shot of improbable distance and accuracy, a better combination than any other!
  • On the tree-shrouded sixth hole, PATRICK McEVILLY THE SENIOR managed a skilled tee shot which traveled past several potentially treacherous hazards and ended its journey on the green, very close to its desired resting place!
  • On the seventh hole – a dog-legged tangle of trees and hills – young master PAUL SCHUETTLER skillfully placed his second strike onto the green at a lesser distance to the hole than any other golfer!
These gentlemen were feted by their colleagues and they could barely keep pace with the congratulatory pints of ale that flowed their ways. Also, they had ice cream. With sprinkles.

Finally, the team results of the scramble were tabulated and announced. And what could be better than four men being crowned league scramble victors for an entire year? Well, the answer - believe it or not – is EIGHT men being crowned victors, and that is exactly what happened! In a true miracle of the golf gods, the KRAUS and McGETTIGAN teams (or McGETTIGAN and KRAUS teams, if that's your persuasion) finished the course with the exact same number of strokes – 29, three below par for the course! Scramble organizers scrambled (indeed!) to research the available tie breakers. Tie breaker after tie breaker was evaluated but, after each, neither of the two behemoths would stand down. Once the tie breakers were exhausted, it was perfectly clear that not the slightest hair separated the performances of this modern day Monitor and Merrimack.

At the announcement that the scramble had ended in a dead heat, the eight victors were encircled by the remaining partygoers, who chanted several rounds of “Hip! Hip! Hooray!!”

As the crowd reeled from the excitement of the championship finish, the results for the third place finish were learned, and they mirrored those for first place! The NELSON and DVORAK teams finished in their own dead heat, at two strokes under par for the course. More congratulatory back-patting commenced, until all were exhausted from the celebration.

There was, however, just enough remaining energy and glee for patron Shawn McGettigan to lead the merrymakers in a boisterous round of "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow," in appreciation of your humble servant - the league commissioner. The gratitude was graciously received and returned to the singing golfers.

The exciting results are below.

Strokes123456789Score
Kraus32244343429
McGettigan33244342429
Dvorak33344243430
Nelson43244343330
Miller33344343431
McEvilly43345243432
Wolfe44335343433
Moritz43344443433
Williams44344352534
Loescher33455354537

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Where are the week 9 results?